I’m Not Ready Yet.

To those across the aisle who are asking me to “come together with our new President for the sake of the country,” or those on my side of the aisle who are asking me to be more tolerant: No. I’m not ready. I wish I could go with you on this one, but I am…

Show Biz And Marriage

I must confess that it is really difficult to describe some of the wacky commercial shoots I work on to the average civilian, let alone my wife. I have been on sets where we stuffed an old lady in the trunk of a car so she could bake cookies, had an actor wear a pair…

The Speed Of Hollywood

I was working on a commercial on the grounds of CAA’s World Headquarters, marveling at how many stories of glass and concrete a small group of people could afford who make their living off the work of others, when the first A.D. yelled, “That’s lunch! One hour!” I queued up to the catering truck, eagerly…

I’m Packin’ So You’re Wrong

An election year is truly a polarizing event. Actually, it’s more like Halloween.  Because people you see every day, people you usually get along with, suddenly appear before you wearing the ghastly costume of reactionary conservatives (or uppity liberals, depending on which side of the fence). With the election looming in the distance like a…

Christmas Starts After Thanksgiving, Dammit!

­I saw my first Christmas commercial ten days before Halloween this year. Well, okay technically it wasn’t a “Christmas” commercial. It was a “holiday” commercial with lots of red and green decorations, decorated fir trees in the house, snow on windows, stockings over fireplaces, presents, squealing children, Menorahs near the ham . . . but,…

Hollywood Habitat Hell

Holy smokes did we have a dilemma at the Brakeman household. It started a few days ago when the kids found out that I would be working on a PetSmart commercial. I had tried to keep this secret from them, for reasons that will become obvious, but their little snoopy eyes are everywhere. When they…